A Manly Man Bow For Edward (Plus Several Other Articles of Interest).

This week, Edward began a series of complaints concerning the decorative bow that I had long ago attached to the handle of his case. I believe the origin of his complaint was the fact that my bow was pink.

"I am not a homosexual, you know," he declared indignantly. "And besides," he continued, "if my case must have a bow, at least it could be a real bow, and not just a sloppy old knot."

(Edward is rather O.C.D that way, you see. He likes everything to be nearly perfect.)

"But, Edward," I said defensively, "after all, it is my case. You are my guitar, that is. So whatever is yours, must be mine."

Edward disagreed. "Yes, but, I am the one who has to be seen publicly with this sloppy pink bow on my case. How is a guitar, (and a guitar with such a distinguished name as Edward, at that), supposed to keep his dignity when he must go around in public looking this way?"

"But not everyone even knows you're a boy, Edward!" I said.

"I rest my case," he replied indignantly.

Since he insisted on being so stoic about it, I relented.

Above is Edward's first bow.

Now we've upgraded to a nice little manly man bow. Edward is satisfied, because, after all, he does belong to me, and he knows how much I love bows. Isn't he so kind to indulge me?

Speaking of Edward, I believe I will soon be able to get him repaired. You see, for quite some time now, he has been having some problems with his 6th and 5th strings buzzing. I believe one of his bracings is loose on his inside. Also his intonation is quite off. I have recently checked his warranty and discovered that it lasts 4 years longer than I had originally suspected. Naturally, I was quite happy about this. Part of me is quite anxious to get him shipped off and fixed. My guitar teacher believes that Edward will be twice the guitar he is now (and he's amazing now), after he is fixed. The other part of me dreads sending him away because I know I shall miss him terribly. I will have to use Paige's nameless guitar to play worship, and my teacher's likewise nameless guitar for lessons. How desolate I shall be without my Edward to keep me company! Well, I suppose all things must be endured. "To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven", isn't that what the Bible says? Like all seasons, my season of desolation shall end over time.

Good grief, look at me, crying over my desolation when I haven't even begun to become desolate yet! Edward is still here, in my bedroom. It's okay. Phew. I was becoming concerned for a minute there.

Today I went to the Capital with some friends. We had a grand time.

First we went to Old Town Sacramento, where we browsed some shops, escaped the creepy salesman in the candy shop, coughed loudly so that one would have thought we were getting ready to keel over and die every time we passed someone who was smoking, did not take a picture in front of the random man statue, etcetera, etcetera.

Afterwards we travelled a few blocks to the Capitol building, where we took some photographs, I stepped in the mud by accident, and half of us almost walked in wearing pocket knives. Altogether I believe there were five knives on the persons of various people in our party. We luckily remembered in time. Imagine our harmless party of seven walking into the Capitol building with five pocket knives! The security guys would have flipped. That would have been an interesting experience. But I would have been quite angry when they tried to take my knife away from me. I was glad we remembered about them. We tagged along behind a tour group for a little bit, so we could get into the Red Room and the Green Room, and then escape without having to listen to all that tour-guide mumbo-jumbo.

After that, we went to the Old Spaghetti Factory, where I ate Mizithra for the first time. It was quite yummy. :) Also I had Spumoni ice cream for the first time. That was quite yummy also. We ate around 4 and I haven't eaten since then, so you may judge how much we ate because it was so deliciously yummy. Also, I do believe we probably set a record for the loudest party of seven that has ever entered that restaurant, ever, in it's history. People were probably staring at us, thinking to themselves, "Are they ever going to shut up and just eat their pasta?", but we didn't. How could we? We were having so much fun.

Yesterday I got a new haircut. It's quite short. Compared to how it was, especially, that is. I was not planning on having a short haircut. Then, all of a sudden, on the way to the salon, I had a terrible urge to cut off my hair. My mum was rather skeptical, so I texted Anne. I can always count on her in times of crisis, you know. (Don't you just love people like that? I do.) Anyway, I texted Anne, who helped me decide to cut my hair. So I did. It's quite strange, all of a sudden having a foot less hair than you had before. But I like it. It's really easy to style it, too, which is handy. :)

I have applied for cosmetology school. I am anxiously awaiting my reply now. If they accept me, then I have to take an aptitude test. And then if I pass, and there is no way I could not pass - dang it, that was a double negative, huh? Urgh. Oh well. Forgive me. Anyway, then if I pass, they decide if they want me or not and if they want me then I can start in June. I am so excited! I hope it works out. I had heard that cosmetology school was really difficult to get into, but then lately I have been hearing quite the opposite, so I just hope it works out. That would be super awesome.

To Write Love On Her Arms week is coming up. March 1st through the 5th. I'll probably participate. :) It's always fun to have a legit excuse to color all over my arm with Sharpies. "Love is the movement."

Also my BarlowGirl concert is coming up too. March 2nd... :D I can't wait!

I was reading on Shannon Kubiak Primicerio's blog that's on her website the other day, specifically on her two posts, "Are Promise Rings Premature", Parts I and II. I don't know why I liked them so much, because I'm totally not going through anything at all like that right now. At all. But I really liked it. Maybe because I know so many people who have stuff like that going on...? I don't know... But you should read those posts. Super good.

And so pretty much that's it. ♥ Yep.

Songs That I Like.

Not Sure

How long will it take for these ties for you to break?
They're much stronger than I thought.

And I'm not sure that I'll get over you.
I'm not sure that I want to.

How long till you're gone from every troubled thought?
'Cause you're still here to heal what's wrong.

And I'm not sure that I'll get over you.
I'm not sure that I want to.

We both made the call but it was only my fault.
Such a beautiful view, with a long way to fall.
I was afraid how it could hurt to leave the safety up above, but if it doesn't, it's not love.

How long till I don't feel like you're still right here, reminding me of what is real?

I'm not sure that I'll get over you.
I'm not sure that I want to.

I'm not sure that I'll get over you.
I'm not sure that I want to.



Beauty and the Mess

Blue water, blue eyes color me.
If any could come this close, I would let them see.
Get it out again, and play 'em one more song.
It's all they really want and who's to say that's wrong?

Ain't that what you want them to know?
All they get of you is what they get out of the show.
The rest is mine, I guess, the beauty and the mess, to hide.

I pull myself under, and down I go again.
It's just a little bit hard, letting them in.
Looking at the world through elusive eyes.
I hide in the spotlight, it's a great disguise.

Ain't that what you want them to know?
All they, all they get of you is what they get out of the show.
The rest is mine, I guess, the beauty and the mess, to hide.

Behind the melody the words don't mean a thing.
But every tone I play, I give whatever I've not said away.
Behind the melody the words don't mean a thing.
But every tone I play, I give whatever I've not said away.
Behind the melody the words don't mean a thing.
But every tone I play would give whatever I've not said away.

Ain't that what you want them to know?
All they, all they get of you is all they get of you is what they get out of the show.
The rest is mine, I guess, the beauty and the mess.

Ain't that what you want them to know?
All they get of you is what they get out of the show.
The rest is mine, I guess, the beauty and the mess.
The rest, the rest, is mine, I guess, the beauty and the mess.
The rest, the rest, is mine, I guess, I guess, the beauty and the mess, to hide.



Let Your Love Be Strong

In this world of news, I've found nothing new, I've found nothing pure.
Maybe I'm just idealistic to assume that truth could be fact and form - that love could be a verb.
Maybe I'm just a little misinformed.

As the dead moon rises, and the freeways sigh.
Let the trains watch over the tide and the mists, spinning circles in our skies tonight.
Let the trucks roll in from Los Angeles, maybe our stars are unanimously tired.

Let your love be strong, and I don't care what goes down.
Let your love be strong enough to weather through the thunder cloud.
Fury and thunder clap like stealing the fire from your eyes.
All of my world hanging on your love.

Let the wars begin, let my strength wear thin.
Let my fingers crack, let my world fall apart, train the monkeys on my back to fight.
Let it start tonight, when my world explodes.
When my stars touch the ground, falling down like broken sattelites.

Let your love be strong, and I don't care what goes down.
Let your love be strong enough to weather through the thunder cloud.
Fury and thunder clap like stealing the fire from your skies.
All of my world hanging on, all that I am resting on your love.



Hello Hurricane

I've been watching the skies, they've been turning blood red.
No doubt in my mind anymore, there's a storm up ahead.

Hello hurricane, you're not enough.
Hello hurricane, you can't silence my love.
I've got doors and windows boarded up, all your dead end fury is not enough.
You can't silence my love, my love.

Everything I have, I count as loss.
Everything I have is stripped away.
Before I started building, I counted up these costs.
There's nothing left for you to take away.

Hello hurricane, you're not enough.
Hello hurricane, you can't silence my love.
I've got doors and windows boarded up, all your dead end fury is not enough.
You can't silence my love, my love.

I'm a fighter, fighting for control.
I'm a fighter, fighting for my soul.
Everything inside of me surrenders.
You can't silence my love.
You can't silence my love, yeah.

Hello hurricane, you're not enough.
Hello hurricane, you can't silence my love.
I've got doors and windows boarded up, all your dead end fury is not enough.
You can't silence my love.

Yeah, I said, 'hello, hurricane.'

Pretty much all I can say is, I love music, and if it bothers you, well... too bad. I pity you. Everyone should love music. And... yeah.

Sweet Revenge

- Sweet Revenge -

Did you see that I was hurt?
Did you know that you had left me crying there?
Now I'm holding all your words close, till you feel this pain too.
But you live on so unaware, while I thought, somehow, this hate would heal me.
But this hate is neverending, and it's only killing me.

O, sweet revenge, you've lied again.

I find I can't get free till I release this vengeance that I seek.
Forgive you, the only thing.
I wanna live, I'm ready to be free.

Maybe you've been wounded too.
Maybe all this is your self-protection.
And all the hurts you thought were hidden are the ones now hurting me.

So who will make this pattern end?

I find I can't get free till I release this vengeance that I seek.
Forgive you, the only thing.
I wanna live.

I'm ready to break these chains.
I wanna see this through, 'cause setting you free means my freedom too.

I find I can't get free till I release this vengeance that I seek.
Forgive you, the only thing.
I wanna live, I'm ready to be free.
To be free...

Today, I Have Done Nothing of Significance (Except Eat Chocolate).

Here are the things I have done today :

1 : slept in.

2 : played on the computer.

3 : ate chocolate.

4 : been lazy.

5 : read a fantastic book.

6 : done chores.

So far, I have not gotten to homework, or my nap yet. I think I've fallen a bit behind schedule. Oh dear.

It is the Cleverest People Who Have it the Hardest in Life.

Today I was out in the rain. It's days like these that make me wish I had asked my mummy for the orange coat that had a hood on it, and long sleeves, instead of the beautifully awesome plaid one that I have, which has no hood, and 3/4 sleeves. Oh well. I always love it when I walk in the door and each of my sisters exclaims loudly, "What happened to your hair?" As if I was not aware that my hair is out of the immaculate state of perfection in which my soul delights. Ah, the joy of unusually perceptive sisters. They can point out the obvious like no other.

Our snowboarding trip was cancelled for tomorrow. I wasn't particularly phased. I wasn't really in the mood for snowboarding anyway. We considered going on our own, despite the storm, but decided against it. I really am not up for being cold and miserable all day, anyway. Therefore, my goals for tomorrow are:

1 : sleep in.

2 : catch up on homework.

3 : take a nap.

4 : hang out with Edward - make up for having neglected him lately.

5 : be lazy.

6 : find some chocolate and eat it.

7 : hang out with Jesus - make up for having neglected Him lately, also.

8 : find something constructive to do so as to avoid spending ridiculous amounts of time online.

Good objectives, don't you think so? I shall try to cover them all, anyway. I'm most concerned about the nap, though. My naps never seem to work out for me.

I am dying to spend some money on Legalsounds.com right now. I am just positively desperate for some new music. I'm just trying to justify spending $50 all at once, on music. Not that I have a problem with that - my mum does. Well, I suppose we shall see. If you don't see me around for a couple of months, well, you'll know what happened. Get it? I said I was "dying" for new music...? Oh... Nevermind. *Sigh.*

The life of the clever is a difficult one, of that you may be sure.

One Hundred Characters in Honour of My One Hundredth Post.

This is my ONE HUNDREDTH post.









Give yourself a pat on the back, you just read my whole one hundredth post in its entirety. ♥

Amusing Oneself Can Be a Dangerous Thing.

This is not my survey. It's a Facebook survey. Anyone who ever took a Facebook survey probably got this in their notifications. I did. First of all, I looked at it because the title made me laugh. Basically... "Answer honestly... or just lie. That's cool too. Either way." In any event, after I took it, my stupid Facebook would not publish it. And frankly, it was one of the funniest surveys I have taken in a long while. Not to mention my answers. They were pretty funny too, not gonna lie. In any event, here it is. (Oh, by the way, I took advantage of the title offer... but I believe I mentioned every time that I stretched the truth a bit. Or just twisted it entirely. In any event, I mentioned it.)

The Answer Honestly or Just Have Fun Survey

1 : Confess something.
Okay, okay, I admit it. I ate the chocolate. I did it. It was me. You can just shoot me now, because I don't think I can live any longer with the consternation and guilt. It weighs too heavily upon me.

2 : Have you ever dated someone you met online?
I have never dated anyone, met online or no.

3 : What, if anything, do you collect?
I collect Jones bottles. Empty ones. I drink the soda out of them first, of course. Also I collect books. And teddy bears. And old fingernail clippings. (Okay, that was a lie. I don't collect old fingernail clippings.) But I do collect hot guys' cell phone numbers. (Okay, that's a lie too. Really, I'm not interested. I don't even have texting. Okay, okay, that was a lie too, I admit it. Sheesh.)

4 : Is bigger always better?
No. For instance, a bigger bookshelf or a bigger bed is always better, but a bigger rear end is not.

5 : What do you think of natural childbirth?
If one is to go about birthing a child, it seems to me that the best way would be the way God intended it.

6 : What is the worst comment or gesture you have ever made to another driver?
Umm... (Embarrassedly looks at floor.)... "Loser." (Clears throat nervously.) I am going to be allowed to come back to church, right? ...Right? ...No, don't kick me out, please! I didn't mean it! I repent! I repent!

7 : Do you have a bail money stash just in case?
Well, the jar's kind of empty just now, from the last time. But I'm working on filling it back up again.

8 : Do you know how to tie a necktie?
Yes. Yes, I do.

9 : Do you know how to tie a bowtie?
No. No, I do not. Who wears bowties these days, anyway?

10 : Who told you how babies are made?
My schoolteacher. (She's my mother, okay? I was homeschooled. Don't judge!)

11 : Have you ever put something inside the knothole of a tree?
Yes, I do believe I have. I can't remember exactly what, but whatever it was, it probably belonged to Hayden.

12 : Do you peek through construction fences?
No. I'm not in the habit of stalking construction workers. Gen'rally, they tend to appear as if they fell right out of the tip-top of the Ugly Tree and hit every branch on the way down. No offense, if you're a construction worker or anything. I'm sure you don't appear that way at all. Was that a bad thing to say? My mother will probably reprimand me for this one, so I'll apologize for any wounded feelings ahead of time.

13 : Have you ever written anything on a bathroom wall? What?
No. I'm not into defiling public property with dirty language.

14 : Do you have an alias?
Yes. But it's top secret. I could never reveal it in a public forum. They'd have to shoot you, then.

15 : Should men wear wedding rings?
Of course. What kind of a question is that? What, men shouldn't wear a symbol of their vow of love and devotion and faithfulness to their wives, just the same as women do for their husbands? It's the same commitment, so why not wear the same symbol?

16 : Have you made any plans for when you die?
Yes. Shyloh knows what's up. If anything ever should happen, just ask her.

17 : Can a man and a woman just be friends?
Definitely. I don't know where I should be if I couldn't be just friends with guys. Dear me.

The fact that I posted this on Facebook and then also on my blog tells me that I amuse myself too much for my own good. I had better hurry up and get more boring so I won't keep amusing myself in this manner. Dear me, how complicated this situation is becoming. Oh dear...

A Congratulatory Post

This is a congratulatory post. Who are you congratulating?, you may ask. Well, I shall tell you.

I am congratulating myself. Why are you congratulating yourself?, you may ask. Well, I shall tell you that also.

I am congratulating myself because I have posted 14 times in February. This is my 14th post this month. What is the significance of that?, you may ask. What I shall tell you this time is that you need not ask anymore questions. Questions bore me. I'm going to tell you, regardless of your dull and insignificant questions, so you needn't keep asking them. If you must ask your questions, do us all a favor and ask them in your own head, instead of where I can see them. As I say, it bores me terribly. And I simply despise being bored.

Nevertheless, since you asked the silly question, I suppose I shall answer it. After all, I can never bear to leave a question unanswered. They simply eat one alive, questions that hang around unanswered that way. Therefore, the significance of my 14 posts in the 22 days that have passed so far in February is that this means that I have posted nearly every day since I have started blogging again. Which in turn means that I have rather become an avid blogger again. Which in turn also means that I am very happy. Hence, this congratulatory post.

Congratulations!

Blah.

Today my mamma is sick. I'm rather realizing how much she usually does and how much I usually don't do. Life is rather hard without her. Haha. Our house has been in some sort of chaotic disorder pretty much all day. At least I got most of my homework finished. All that I have for tomorrow is some art and a research paper... ugh. Fun weekend.

Heck No, Techno!

Yesterday I drank an Arnold Palmer. I was sort of expecting to get rather hyper, as I usually do whenever I drink caffiene, natural or no. But I didn't. I was a tad disappointed; I was hoping for a sugar high to keep me semi-awake during ASL. But alas, I was forced to endure with an empty can of sugary goodness and a sugar... low?

Also yesterday I voluntarily awakened at the hour of 6:30 a.m., which, as you might have guessed, is highly unusual for me. I am one of those... "night people," that you hear about on television and read about in the Sunday newspaper. I think it is quite safe to say that I loathe mornings. I have attempted to shun the mornings, on several occaisions, and have repeatedly been successful in an entirely pleasurable and almost completely satisfactory manner. Most unfortunately, though, my experimentations with shunning have been 'most always terribly short-lived. My mother does not approve of shunning things so steadfast as the mornings, you see. A very unfortunate predicament, indeed.
In any case, I awakened at 6:30, yesterday. It was horrible. For some reason, I decided to repeat the process today. My results were much less horrible and not half so successful. Because, you see, today, I remembered that lovely thing, the snooze button. And I pressed it. Several times. Which resulted in my awakening at 8 instead. I think my attempt at welcoming the morning was a trend which I shall not make any effort to continue in.

Whoever invented chocolate is the greatest person I ever have heard of. Anyone who could divine of their own imagination such goodness must be absolutely my hero. Therefore, it must have been God who invented chocolate. Therefore, God must be absolutely my hero, because chocolate is bomb dot com.

Also, I am wearing two different socks at this very moment. Even as I type, my two socks do not match. They do not even coordinate. I think this may be a sign. If you think you may know what this is a sign of, feel free to let me know. Because I have to say, I am quite at my wit's end on this one. Any advice will be accepted and appreciated, unless it is not uplifting advice. I never accept advice that is not uplifting. And I very rarely appreciate it.

Surely We Can Change... Right?

I have a savage bruise on my hand, and another one on my arm. They're pretty... savage. I believe I acquired them while sparring last Tuesday. Ah, well, pain is the price one pays to sport the scars of battle. One of life's downsides.

Taekwondo today was rather terrible. I despise push ups. Intensly. I intensly despise push ups. And it is my opinion that spending such a large portion of a class doing push ups is treacherous and should be stopped immediately. Of course, if my opinion counted in this equation, no push ups would have been performed at all. On top of all the push ups, we were forced to rotery jog for a good ten minutes before all the yellow belts were ready to participate. Also, we never had the opportunity to do anything fun. Even our patterns were slightly lame. Altogether it was a sadly disappointing class.

It saddens me that I never get any comments. If you are reading this, you should comment. It would make me feel better. :)

Also, this is the best song ever.

When I Go Down

I'll tell You flat out
It hurts so much to think of this, so from my thoughts I will exclude
The very thing that I hate more than everything is the way I'm powerless to dictate my own moods

I've thrown away so many things that could've been much more
And I just pray my problems go away if they're ignored
But that's not the way it works, no that's not the way it works

When I go down, I go down hard
And I take everything I've learned, and teach myself some disregard
When I go down, it hurts to hit the bottom
And of the things that got me there, I think, if only I had fought them

If and when I can clear myself of this clouded mind, I'll watch myself settle down into a place where peace can search me out
And find that I'm so ready to be found

I've thrown away the hope I had in friendships
I've thrown away so many things that could have been much more
I've thrown away the secret to find an end to this
And I just pray my problems go away if they're ignored
But that's not the way it works, no that's not the way it works

When I go down, I go down hard
And I take everything I've learned, and teach myself some disregard
When I go down, it hurts to hit the bottom
And of all the things that got me there, I think, if only I had thought them

Any control I thought I had just slips right through my hands, while my ever-present conscience shakes its head and reprimands me
Reprimands me
Then and there, I confess
I'll blame all this on my selfishness
Yet You love me, and that consumes me
And I'll stand up again, and do so willingly

You give me hope, and hope it gives me life
You touch my heavy heart, and when You do, You make it light
As I exhale, I hear your voice, and I answer You, though I hardly make a noise
And from my lips the words I choose to say seem pathetic, but it's fallen man's praise, because I love You
O God, I love You

And life is now worth living, if only because of You
And when they say that I'm dead and gone, it won't be further from the truth
When I go down, I lift my eyes to You
I won't look very far, 'cause You'll be there with open arms, to lift me up again
To lift me up again

Basically I love that song. It's so... perky.

I have to talk to a couple deaf kids at Downey this next week for a report. I'm kind of nervous. I always get nervous, and I usually end up having a good time. But I can't help being nervous anyways. I'm always afraid I'll mess up or something.

I think I've decided on my song for ASL this semester. "Surely We Can Change" by David Crowder* Band. I'm super excited about it. I think I might do another song too, just to make my teacher happy. But we shall see.

And I also really love that song too.

Surely We Can Change

And the problem is this: we were bought with a kiss
But the cheek still turned, even when it wasn't hit

And I don't know what to do with a love like that
And I don't know how to be a love like that

When all the love in the world is right here, among us, and hatred too
So we must choose what our hands will do

Where there is pain, let there be grace
Where there is suffering, bring serenity
For those afraid, help them be brave
Where there is misery, bring expectancy
And surely we can change
Surely we can change something

And the problem, it seems, is with you and me
Not the Love who came to repair everything

And I don't know what to do with a love like that
And I don't know how to be a love like that

And all the love in the world is right here, among us, and hatred too
So we must choose what our hands will do

Where there is pain, let us bring grace
Where there is suffering, bring serenity
For those afraid, let us be brave
Where there is misery, let us bring them relief
And surely we can change
Surely we can change something

Our whole world's about to change
The whole world's about to change
The whole world's about to change

It's a beautiful song. Rather provoking, I think. It rather stirs me to get of my lazy bum and do something about something. I just don't know what. Hm...

He is My Joy. ♥

I have been reading the Psalms for devotionals lately. I believe I have mentioned this before. In any event, the other afternoon I happened to come across Psalm 107. I read it, and for some reason, it particularly impacted me that morning. I could tell that God was speaking to me through it, but I didn't really understand it.

Then, O joy, our Psalm tonight in youth group "just happened" to be Psalm 107. Coincidence? I think not. David's teaching on it was simply amazing and I was like, "Oh... that's what God was telling me the other day, that I didn't understand," and it was SO COOL! God is just SO good!

And then worship was awesome! Exactly the right songs. I think that whole study was just for me. Haha! It was just exactly what I needed. I was just so blessed by it.

Jesus is just so awesome, He never ceases to amaze me.

I am just... ahhhhh, Jesus is so good. I still don't know why He loves me. Pretty crazy, thinking about it.

O happiness! ♥

In Which Edward Narrowly Escapes Death.

Edward narrowly escaped death this evening. His escape was so narrow that he was nearly killed in the process of escaping. Ironic, eh? Ahem.

(If you hadn't noticed, lately I have formed a habit of saying 'ahem' after I make a lame joke. It rather means, "That was, errr, supposed to be funny, but I know it wasn't really, so you needn't feel obligated to laugh. Also, I'm moving on now, so you don't feel lame about not laughing at my un-funny joke." It rather amuses me, if no one else. As I say, you needn't feel obligated to laugh. I amuse myself and select other people, which is plenty for me. I would get nervous if I got too funny and too many people started paying attention to me. Ahem.)

In any event, Edward's terribly narrow escape rather, if I may use the vernacular, scared the 'crap' out of me. I was nothing less than terribly frightened, to say the very least. If Edward had happened to die so suddenly, at so young an age, I simply would have cried profusely. In fact, the extent of the salt water that would probably have streamed from my eyes might well have been labeled 'weeping'. Fortunately, this was not necessary, as my incredible ninja skills saved Edward. As you might imagine, I was more than unusually proud of myself. But more than that, terribly grateful that Edward is still with us today. He is resting at the moment, as he was rather shaken up after the shock of the ordeal. After all, one does not have to deal with narrowly escaping death every day.

True Love Waits

I find that I have quite often been one of those girls who is looking forward to nothing but growing up so I can get married and have children and do grown up things. But lately, I find that there is a lot more to life than just growing up.

I've searched my whole life for my "prince", and at one point thought I had found him, only to discover that my personal preference and God's plan for my life don't always line up exactly. Go figure. In any event, having moved past that difficult situation, I've discovered that I don't really need a "prince", or any kind of a special guy in my life right now.

I mean, eventually my desire is to get married and have kids. That's always been on my heart. But I don't need it now. I have gotten myself into this mindset, and I think a lot of girls do, that I need to hurry up and find someone quickly, or it will be too late, and I'll be left an old maid for the rest of my life. That if I haven't found the guy I'm gonna marry before I'm 18 that I'll be doomed to spinster-hood. Ha! If that isn't the most ridiculous thing ever, I don't know what is.

I've been literally searching, and that's not what God wants of me. I'm not supposed to go seek out my own guy. God will bring someone into my life whenever He sees fit, and it will be the perfect guy who will pursue me. Not the other way around. I needed to step back and let God do His thing, because He can do it a LOT better than I can. I should have been waiting on Him to do the job all along.

But I've seriously felt for a long time that if I didn't look real hard and find a guy that I'd never be able to get married or whatever. Not even trusting that God would bring the right person into my life at exactly the right time.

And I think it's time for me to move past that. To enjoy where I'm at in life right now. To enjoy being in high school and hanging out with my girlfriends and doing fun girl stuff and not even worrying about boys. Who needs boys? Not I.

So I think I'm gonna nix the "find a guy really fast so I can get married really young" idea, and I'm gonna have fun being a high school kid instead.

Sound like a plan? I think so. :)

Holidays Were Made For Being Lazy. It's True.

Tomorrow begins my four day holiday. I shall enjoy it immensely. As a student, there is nothing better than any time when I have no homework. Or at least, very little. (I got a little behind today, you see.) I am determined to sleep in as long as possible and finish my chores as quickly as possible so I can laze about at my liesure. As long as my lovely mum doesn't decide to conjure up something extra for me to do, I shall have a terribly, beauteously lazy four day weekend. It is going to be stupendous.

You'll Never Hear ME Say "Whatever Floats Your Boat" Because That's Just Plain Silly.

I have listened to a bit of Flyleaf lately. And pretty much this song is amazing. I love it so much!

All Around Me - Flyleaf

My hands are searching for You
My arms are outstretched towards You
I feel You on my fingertips
My tongue dances behind my lips for You

The fire rising through my being
Burning, I'm not used to seeing You

I'm alive, I'm alive

I can feel You all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healing

My hands float up above me
And You whisper You love me
And I begin to fade into our secret place

The music makes me sway
The angels singing say we are alone with You
I am alone, and they are too, with You

I'm alive, I'm alive

I can feel You all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healing

And so I cry
The light is white
And I see You

I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive

I can feel You all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healing

Take my hand
I give it to You
Now You own me
All I am
You said You would never leave me
I believe You
I believe

I can feel You all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healed

This morning during my devotional, I was reading Psalm 5, and it was just so amazing that I had to write it down in my journal because it spoke to me so much! I was looking for a passage on guidance or the Lord's will in our lives or something of that nature, and flipping through the Psalms, and the header on Psalm 5, at least in my Bible, is "A prayer for guidance". So obviously I had to stop and read it. AND it was amazing. So here it is. Be prepared to soak in the amazingness.

Psalm 5 - A prayer for guidance

1 Give ear to my words, O Lord,
Consider my meditation.
2 Give heed to the voice of my cry,
My King and my God,
For to You I will pray.
3 My voice You shall hear in the morning, O Lord;
In the morning I will direct it to You,
And I will look up.

4 For You are not a God who takes pleasure in wickedness,
Nor shall evil dwell with You.
5 The boastful sahll not stand in Your sight;
You hate all workers of iniquity.
6 You shall destroy those who speak falsehood;
The Lord abhors the bloodthirsty and decietful man.

7 But as for me, I will come into Your house in the multitude of Your mercy;
In fear of You I will worship toward Your holy temple.
8 Lead me, O Lord, in Your righteousness because of my enemies;
Make Your way straight before my face.

9 For there is no faithfulness in their mouth;
Their inward part is destruction;
Their throat is an open tomb;
They flatter with their tongue.
10 Pronounce them guilty, O God!
Let them fall by thier own counsels;
Cast them out in the multitude of their transgressions,
For they have rebelled against You.

11 But let all those rejoice who put their trust in You;
Let them ever shout for joy, because You defend them;
Let those also who love Your name
Be joyful in You.
12 For You, O Lord, will bless the righteous;
With favor You will surround him as with a shield.

It's just so awesome to me that we can put our trust in Him and know that He will defend us! We can rejoice in His love because we know that He is in control and He will take care of us. He is directing our paths and if we will only pay attention to Him, He will "make His way straight before our face"! Isn't that splendid?

Today while I was in town with my mum, I saw a car that had "JUST DIVORCED" painted in large capital letters on the back window. Isn't that so sad? I literally almost cried. How horrible! What is this world coming to? Because I am here to tell you, if I was ever so terribly unfortunate as to suffer through a divorce (I hope and pray that never, ever, EVER happens, but...), you can be quite sure that I will not be proclaiming it to the world by painting it on the back of my car! I was quite perturbed.

I got a new hat. It is not as crazy and spontaneous as might have been desired, but there are always other hats. And for the present, this one is nice and grey and has a bill that will not obstruct my peripheral vision and will keep my noggin quite toasty while I'm at the snow. Plus it has two little grommets on the bill that just look cool. Maybe I'll pin a bow on it or something. Or not. In any event, it will serve the purpose quite nicely, as far as hats go. Altogether a quite satisfactory hat.

Hopefully you were not bothered by the length of this post, with the song lyrics and the whole Psalm and all, but if you were, I'm not sorry. Because this is my blog, and if you don't like it, well, then, maybe you shouldn't read it.

I believe I've said before that I don't like compromise? That saying, "Whatever floats your boat," is one of the most ridiculous I have heard yet. I would never say that. It's quite silly, in my opinion.

In any event, 5 a.m. is approaching rather too quickly for my taste, and so I shall depart for the realm of slumber.

Everyone Needs a Crazy and Spontaneous Hat.

This morning, in church, I learned that today was the Super Bowl. I don't know how I could not have known that. I feel very detached from society. Not that that's a bad thing. I'm still not sure who won. But whatever. It's not like I care.

I have a new snowboard, because my old one was quite a bit too large for me, since Da bought it for me in 6th grade, when we still thought I was going to grow. It's black with pink detailing. It's pretty awesome. It's so tiny though! Haha. But I guess it fits me. :) I like it, anyways.

I want to get a new hat for the next time we go snowboarding. I don't have a cool hat. I think I need one. Maybe one with earflaps. Or some fur. Or something crazy. I feel like I should have a crazy, spontaneous hat. It just seems like something everyone should have. Like I'm slightly deprived, because I don't have one. I think I must remedy this situation.

I was called a 'twerp' today, for the first time. By a 3rd grader. A very funny 3rd grader, who couldn't pronounce his "R's". You can imagine how 'twerp' sounded, coming from him. I was hard-pressed to keep myself from laughing in his face. Pretty hilarious.

Our class was actually normal-sized tonight. Anne and I had expected a small class because of Super Bowl but we had seven kids, as usual. When the kids started getting a bit crazy, Anne told them I had a machete. Trevor argued that we said before that Zak had the machete. So then Anne told him that I had Zak's machete, and so I had to "explain" how Zak had loaned me his machete so I could guard the children, "just in case". Of course then they wanted to know "just in case" of what? So Anne said it was to guard them, in case any dragons invaded. Then we discussed dragon invasions for a while, then we were back to the machete, then we discussed how old and decrepit Anne and I would be when our 3rd graders were in Junior High.

And Trevor colored these awesome pictures for Anne and I. It's a battle scene, with lots of arrows protruding from armor and bloody swords and fallen men. It's pretty great. He tucked a little note into the envelope too, that said, "God bless thy". He meant for it to say "God bless thee," but he spelled it wrong. So funny! My envelope was addressed to "Catty". ;) Hahaha! It was pretty great.

Friends Do Not Have All Things In Common. "Anyone Who Says Differently Is Selling Something."

That was quoted from the infamous Princess Bride. Well, not really infamous. More like... renouned. :)

My calendar has a friend quote for every day... Today it had a quote from Plato. It said, "Friends have all things in common." And I think that's just stupid. Why should friends have to have all things in common? That's just ridiculous. Because I am here to tell you that I do not have all things in common with any one of my friends. And I have amazing friends. So that's ridiculous. All respect to Plato, but it must've been one of his bad days when he said that one. Ahem.

At the moment, I am listening to Thousand Foot Krutch. I really like them. A lot. They are doing a concert here in a few days. I want to go really badly. I hope that I can. Because that would be just awesome.

Writing is pretty much my passion. Besides music, that is. I just realized again how much I like it. I wish I had more time to indulge. Haha! I suppose if I didn't spend so much time on Facebook I probably would have more time. Maybe I should work on that.

An Epic Fail

So, I tried recording myself singing and playing guitar today, for a music project for school. Normally for music I take a picture of myself with my guitar and write a paragraph about how I go to guitar class every week and play guitar at home most every day, etcetera. This method is very convenient for me, being as lazy as I am, but unfortunately, my E.S. gets tired of the same ol', same ol'... on occaision. So this time I decided to mix it up a little bit, to make her happy, and do a recording of myself. Unfortunately, I have a really good mic, but no editting software whatsoever, and a recorder that will only record 60 seconds at a time. Ugh. I have two words for my attempt, and they are these:

epic fail.

Yeah. So, that was an interesting portion of my day.

The remainder of my day consisted of - (...drumroll please...) - homework! Hallelujah!... Not. Story of my life.

Um, and basically, I have a really boring and also lame weekend ahead of me. So... yeah. And after that is, ugh, Monday. Blah.

I think I shall do some novel-writing tonight. I feel in that sort of mood.

Procrastinating is Fun Until You Have to Do the Buttload of Dishes Still Left in the Sink

I am constantly realizing how absolutely blessed I am! I have often taken my friends for granted, and then over and over again I see how awesome it is that I have such amazing, solid friends who are always there for me, encouraging me and being hilarious and saying exactly what I need them to say, and struggling with me through trials, and triumphing with me when I get past them. And then laughing with me when we look back on them and realize how silly they were in the first place. They're just awesome! I don't know what I'd do without them.

I have realized that I am in great danger of becoming one of the obsessive people that I can't stand. This, as you may realize, is a great predicament. For one to bother oneself with one's own actions is a very complicated situation, and not one I should like to endure for any length of time, whatsoever. The reason I am in danger of becoming one of these obsessive people is because of all of the silly fan pages on Facebook. Apparently, many people have no life, and so they sit around at home and make silly fan pages. Some of the titles of these pages happen to be quite amusing. I never venture to actually look at the page itself. I just look at the title, and click the 'become a fan' button, and there my obsession begins. And it has resulted in exactly 370 pages that I have become a fan of. Slightly ridiculous, wouldn't you agree?

Right now I am procrastinating. There is a sinkful of dishes in the kitchen waiting for me to get off my lazy bum and do them... and here I sit, blogging. And Facebooking. I must be a terrible oldest child. I probably shame my family's name with my laziness. I'm almost embarrassing myself... Maybe I should do the dishes... No! I hate dishes. I will finish my post and then maybe I will get to dishes...

Pretty much guitar class was really fun today. The funnest it's been in a long time. We were soloing... and it was awesome. It actually made sense today.

One thing I can't understand is why people think it's less...bad, I guess... to use a bad word in the form of an acronym, rather than just saying it. It's still a bad word, okay?! It's kind of crazy, like people who I really don't think would normally say words like that spout off acronyms with a bunch of cuss words in them like it's no big deal... I don't get it. Grrrrr...

The Fray is pretty much awesome. And yeah.

A Pet-Hair-Less Sofa

I must, like so many others, attribute my absence from Blogger to my newfound obsession with Facebook. It's a very addicting site. Beware.

My only problem with Facebook is that it's way too impersonal. It's fun to know more specifically what people have been up to, but the status updates are shorter than blog posts and less detailed and there's much less personality involved. If you ask me.

So here I am, on Blogger, once again. I know you've all missed me. All you people who are reading this. Which is probably no one. Except Annie and my madre and Maci. Who, of course, are not 'no one'. They are rather some of the most important people ever. In my little world, that is.

What would be ridiculous would be for me to try and cover everything that has happened to me in the last several months, since I have blogged. So I will not. I will start with now.

I'm not really into baring my soul on the internet. It bothers me. But I will say that lately, God has been doing a lot of work in my life. The past few months I've been having a really hard time with some stuff (Haha, 'stuff'. Like I said, I'm not into baring my soul online), and I've been just struggling a lot with my walk, just wanting to grow closer to God but not being able to. Honestly, I think I was preventing myself from growing because I was limiting Him. Because He can do anything, and my attitude was, "Oh, God, if You do this, then I'll..." etcetera, and really that's not the way it's supposed to work. He's in control. And it just took me a while to wake up and realize that. He's just been showing me a lot of things about myself and about other people. Things that I think He's been trying to show me for a long time, but I was kind of closing myself off to what He was trying to tell me. Because I wasn't trusting that what He had in mind for me was better than the plans I had for myself. Even though it is. It's way better. I can already tell. Ha! Anyway, it's been really cool because I've been just so stoked on Him lately and all that He's doing in my life and how absolutely faithful He is. He is absolutely everything that I need in my life. He loves me with a steadfast love and that is so awesome.

Today, I led worship for Team 56, as I do every week. The only difference between this week and every other week is that this week, I messed up most heinously right in the middle of my first song. It was terribly lame. The really sweet thing about it was, when I finished the song, all the kids clapped for me. This may not seem particularly significant, until I say that they never clap. They never have, not once. And so for them to clap after I'd just blown it was really pretty awesome of them. It made me feel not so lame, for screwing up and everything. I love those kids. That was pretty much the highlight of my day.

The rest of my day was spent doing homework. From this day spent doing homework, I have learned one thing, and it is this: chemistry is from the devil. Can I get an amen? It's a good thing I'm getting A's, because if I was getting lame grades in a class that I hate as much as I hate this one, I would have a coniption fit. No joke. I would just die, I think. Because I hate bad grades, about as much as I hate chemistry.

I also hate cats. They are evil. I do not hate dogs. But I have recently decided that I shall never have a dog of my own. At least not until I gain some sense of responsibility. This is because I like dogs, but I do not like the responsibility of caring for them. I like the responsibility of caring for children, and myself, but not dogs. They are too inanimate. They also are too unresponsive. I like to care for persons or beings who will respond to my care of them, other than barking at me, or rolling around on the floor. That's just annoying. I have decided that I am just not a pet person. So I will probably not own any pets, later on in life. Therefore, you need never fear getting pet hair on you when you sit on MY sofa. Isn't that a comforting thought?

At the present, I am counting down the days until two particular dates:

1) February 18, when I will be eligible to upgrade my cell phone and I can trash this crappy lame one that I have and get a new texting phone. Preferably with a touch screen. I'm thinking LG Xenon. But we'll see. And,

2) April 23, when I will turn 16 years old, and will not be able to do anything more exciting than I can do right now. I wonder why 16 is supposed to be such a milestone, when nothing even happens when you turn 16. I can't even go get a Blockbuster card for Heaven's sake! I suppose if I had gotten my permit when I was supposed to, I would be able to get my driver's license, but as I still have not got a permit, I cannot. And so that is irrelevant. Unfortunately. But I am still looking forward to my birthday.

AND, I get to have a birthday party this year! I suppose I could have had one last year, if I had taken the time to plan it instead of being so lazy. But this year I will have one and it will be the best.